Wednesday, June 16, 2010

How to Win Friends & Influence People

Before I write about this book that I have read, let me give the reference of it. These are because, firstly, not to be accused of plagiarism as some of the contents are taken out from this book; secondly, in case you are interested, you can find this book by using the reference.
Carniege. D, 1981, How to win Friends & Influence People, Revised Edition, USA: Pocket Books


Why review this book? Actually, it's a reminder for me what I have read, and to apply it in daily basis. Also, I would like to share the content with you, this book make sense to me. The motives I read this book were because of recommendation from my mom; and I wish to have better soft skill to communicate with people especially get people willingly to work for you. In my case, not in work field but, in my group assignment. Now, I need to practise by applying it, hopefully I can fully make use of it when is the time for me to my work field.

There are a few section in this book, I will adopt the list from the book, those startling lines are:-

Part 1: Fundamental techniques in handling people
Principles:
Don't criticize, condemn or complain.
Give honest and sincere appreciation.
Arouse the other person an eager want.

Part 2: Six ways to make people like you.
Principles:
Become genuinely interested in other people.
Smile.
Remember that a person's name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language.
Be a good listener. Encourage other to talk about themselves.
Talk in terms the other person's interests.
Make the other person feel important- and do it sincerely.

    Part 3: Win people to your way of thinking
    Principles:
    The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it.
    Show respect for the other person's opinion. Never say, "You're wrong".
    If you are wrong, admit It quickly and emphatically.
    Begin in a friendly way.
    Get the other person saying "yes, yes" immediately.
    Let the other person do a great deal of the talking.
    Try honestly to see things from the other person's point of view.
    Be sympathetic with the other person's ideas and desires.
    Appeal to nobler motives.
    Dramatize your ideas.
    Throw down a challenge.

Part 4: Be a leader
Principles:
Begin with praise and honest appreciation.Call attention to people's mistakes indirectly.
Talk about your own mistake before criticizing the other person.
Ask questions instead of giving direct orders,
Let the other person save face,
Praise the slightest improvement and praise every improvement. Be 'hearty in your approbation and lavish in your praise."
Give the other person a fine reputation to live up to.
Use encouragement. Make the fault seem easy to correct.
Make the other person happy about doing the thing you suggest.


Dale Carniege and his associates had explained the principles above well with examples based on the experience they had gone through, some historical event, and even political evidence that proved the techniques used were very much successful.
The principle listed above may be vague, but you will understand it once you read the book as it contains life examples.
Thanks for reading this blog. Hopefully, I can master the above skills in achieving my dreams.
I wish you benefit from this blog too.

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Inferiority

Yesterday, I fail myself again because I became a negative person again. I have always complained of my height since dinosaur time.

One of my dreadful weaknesses ( yes this kill my confidence) is always low in confidence about myself.

At college (my class) , I am the shortest one, people call me shorty. No matter how frequently I tell my myself height is not an issue, you have the brain, you are smart, you have lots of hidden strength that you don't know, it seems this is just a temporary cure.

When I see my college friends, they are tall and when I see myself I am short.

This feeling occurred again. It really bothers me a lot.

I complaint to my mom. She told me I am stupid if I think that issue again. She said:-
  • " What if you are dying, what actually will be your most important thing in life" "Height?"

  • "You have many wonderful things in life why let height block your fighting spirit?"

  • " You are blessed with a perfect body, you are not handicap or dwarf yet you still have that thought?"
Yes, I got that message. However, I am still stuck in this kind of thought. You might think this is silly, 19 years old still as childish but it is there in me.

I want permanent drugs to kill this thought.

I know that answer is within myself, if I let it, it will be.

Honestly, I blog it here just to release this bad thought. Of course, I will try my best to get rid of this negative "bugs" that have stuck in me for long time.

Just to remind myself, I maybe small and short,but I have chili padi characteristics. Don't ever underestimate me!

Saturday, June 5, 2010

Prince of Persia-Sand of time

I have not blogged for a week already. I will now blog to satisfy those who thirst to read it.... (haha.... perasan pulak!)

No, actually I want to cultivate this habit, so that I will gain more flow in writing and maybe my commad of English will be improved. The feeling of knowing what points to write but does not know how to put in sentence was really sucks. ( I have tried in exams before.) So, now, it is just for me to practise writing so that I won't suffer in the exam.
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My family and I watched this Prince of Persia yesterday at Pavillion. Overall it was okay for me (Robbin Hood was better in my opinion ).The moral of the story was the bond between brotherhod.

No ''a-ha" moment actually.

At least yesterday, I had spent quality time with my family .

The best part of yesterday's activity was to try different food there. We went from restaurant to restaurant. Life is really good with all those delicious food entering your mouth....hehe....